So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize