Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
