Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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