i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
