I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
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How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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