oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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