Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize