So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
