Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
