Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
