i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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