So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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