that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
