Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
