just tell him i said nine months
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
