So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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