There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
