Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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