would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
this just has baby written all over it
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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