woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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