Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
