Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
