Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
