please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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