it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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