I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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