She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize