Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
