I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
