i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
There r osticjed everywhere
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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