dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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