Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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