no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
