You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
