omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize