So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
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