everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize