you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
