is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
