how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
