She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
