Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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