So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize