plz talk dirty to me
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
