Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
