haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize