i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
