I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
