she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
