i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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