people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
i out mim tonsoeep
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